Thursday, 1 September 2011


Letter to Its Sublime Adiposity the Steatpygeous Arch-Eunuch of Mecca
P.O. Box 2, Mecca, São di Arabia

Dear madam or sir:

I am a gentleman and it would never even occur to me to call someone like you, for example, a “pig-headed bastard!”[1]* that is to say, it would only occur to me to attribute such repellent traits to someone, if & insofar as the persons who were conjecturally the targets of my impetuous vituperations – namely in this case YOU and numerous other individuals who share your stone-age superstitions -- neglected forthwith to undertake rigorously to abstain and strictly to refrain forevermore from propagating your prehistoric aboriginal twaddle that is vulgarly known as  “islam” but that I prefer instead on grounds of rigorous scientific nomenclature as well as political expediency to designate as “mohammedan horse-shit”.

The grounds for this opinion are not, alas!, the fruit of any contempt I may feel for outsiders.

Rather my attitude is dictated by a surfeit of Mohammedan initiatives planet wide, which can be summed up in the expression that “Mohammedans are pushy bastards.” 

Recently the Moroccan and Arab fronde in Spain proposed that the Catholic Church share with Mohammedans  the cathedral of Cordova, Spain, which was built over a thousand years ago by the Umayyad dynasty as a mosque and after recapture of Cordova by Christians was converted into a church, without however effecting many prominent architectural alterations.

I find that an excellent idea PROVIDED the Sunni Mohammedan bureaucracy of Turkey  grants equal rights of  use of the Mosque of Agia Sofia. in Constantinople, to  the Greek Orthodox Church, its original occupant.


Infidel Kaştrovič
Top Banana
Ad Hoc Tactical Interfaith Dialogue Strike Force

* Please  forgive my oblique reference to the uncouth porcine allusions that, at least from an Islamo-Fascist standpoint, so mar my native culture.

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