Sunday, 10 July 2011

Poor Persecuted Mohammedans Part II -- ISLAM-SCAM No. 26

Islam-Scam No. 26: “WAR AGAINST ISLAM”
by our political commentator 
Infidel Kaştrovič

So, we  may safely conclude from Part I, that the “war against Islam” theory does not hold water.
In everyday English, it's what's known as “horse-shit”.  
And Mohammedan horse-shit to boot, by far the most pernicious variety. 
Mohammedanism -- sometimes also rather alarmingly called “E-slam!”, as if it were a new teenage fad -- is a genocidal ideology whose roots are lost in the mists of time –- which is probably a good thing, when you think what might turn up if we really tried to get to the bottom of the issue. But one thing is certain: it is a genocidal ideology that is incessantly and grievously afflicted by an excruciating persecution complex. The Case of the Haunted Serial Killer.

No matter how gross a Mohammedan’s misdeeds become, he's always whining and sniveling about someone that done him wrong. Alas, Mohammedans suffer so outrageously under this imaginary persecution syndrome that some kind souls (generally inexperienced idealists who haven’t yet been warned about Islam-Scam no. 26) are taken in and gullibly buy the Mohammedan’s hard luck story hook, line and sinker, setting themselves up for weeks or perhaps years of old-fashioned Islamic freeloading and exploitation. So while he’s still busy plucking his latest victim’s belongings he is loudly bewailing the cruelty of some bastard infidel that gave his sainted grandmother the bum’s rush. And the clap.    

Although Mohammedanism occasionally makes a sporting but thoroughly unpersuasive pretense of being a civilized institution, in truth and in fact Islam got stuck in the thick undergrowth right around the middle of Barbarism Stretch II, and has been unable to make any headway since about the ninth century of the Common Era. It sort of seized up after the Mongols got through with it, and has been unable to make any independent motion worthy of mention since right around the time of Hulagu.

I think it is fair to say that the built-in conflicting stresses that plague Mohammedanism result from its being designed to accomplish two inconsistent purposes simultaneously, namely that of operating as a Mafioso personality cult at the same time as it promises pie in the sky allegedly to provide for the material and spiritual needs of the countless miserable bipeds who cling forlornly to its doomed hulk, while casting glances of increasing desperation from beneath cavernous eye sockets.

The atavistic impulse toward enthusiastic savagery that Mohammedanism holds in store for its most loyal -– and bloodthirsty -- devotees seems to be an incurable, but unfortunately not a fatal, symptom of its root disease.  

Until a definitive remedy is found for the parlous state of this dismal swamp of jury-rigged and largely random codswallop known as Mohammedanism, I recommend that bandit-cult preachers be prevailed upon – if need be by colossal bribes or terrifying menaces  -- to imbibe generous doses of the newest and most powerful tranquilizers every Friday about 90 minutes before they are scheduled to address their respective flocks. This technique, pioneered by the KGB in Outer Mongolia in the 1930s, was effective for decades in suppressing the more primitive impulses of several confederations of Central Asian hordes that were constantly on the brink of insurrection. Who knows, without the KGB backing us up in the wastes of Siberia, we might long since have been blindsided by brutal incursions triggered by delayed spastic reactions to the late Genghis Kahn’s genomic sequence.

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