Saturday, 14 May 2011

A Brief History of Porkistan by Adolf Hitlist

A Brief History of Porkistan from the 
-earliest times until the Hula Hoop Revival-

by Adolf Hitlist
(including West Porkistan, and, for a while, East Porkistan, but under no circumstances Central Porkistan)
&
CONTAINING NUMEROUS DIGRESSIONS ON SUNDRY
MATTERS OF PUBLIC CONCERN.

Think about Porkistan: devout Moslems sneak into Moslem shrines among hundreds of devout pilgrims and
 killing hundreds of pious wayfarers. Why?

Because people who go on pilgrimages to pray at Moslem shrines are worse than unbelievers! (that means WORSE THAN you AND me)

Says who?
Says Abdul Wahhab, the Top Banana of the Salafi cult, a man so puritanical that he wore only black underwear and copulated only with goats!

Chorus of 3  camels:

In São di Arabia, Abdul Wahhab’s word is law!
So don't get any clever ideas like doin’ the hanky-panky!
In São di Arabia doin’ the hanky-panky is punishable by death!

Crazy Imam no.  3:
 
Wahhabism is a no-frills cult.
That means if they catch you with a frill they roast it alive and make you eat it.

Narrator [a clone of T.S. Eliot]:
 
São di Arabia is an extremely decent and respectable country. The likelihood of seeing any public hair in pubic places, or for that matter seeing any pubic hair in public places, is astronomically low.
But the population must make sacrifices to keep their country so clean and respectable.

In 2002 a fire broke out at night in a girls boarding school in Riyadh. Panicky girls emerged onto the street wearing ONLY THEIR BATHROBES! Thank heavens for the Morality Police, who were on the beat, and quick as a wink, collared those licentious little sluts and pushed the little tramps right back into the burning school, where they were duly burnt to a crisp, no doubt after undergoing terrible sufferings! 
On the other hand the community was spared the sinful spectacle of pre-pubescent girls exhibiting their ankles on the public thoroughfare at 3 a.m.! 
Allah was very pleased. 
So as you see, Wahhabism has two aspects: its grisly aspect and its inhuman aspect. Quite similar to Stalinism, in a way, but not so gemütlich

(to be cuntinued)

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